Thursday, April 30, 2009

hello again.

i thought i'd just update so this blog doesn't just die, like i let it die before.

sometimes i don't even really feel like i have anything interesting to say that other people would want to read!
it's weird for my to write so publically; it makes me want to be careful about what i say.
but i'll try not to be. haha. i guess i shouldn't have anyone else in mind while writing here, since it's my blog. part of the purpose is to share my "work" too though...
what work?

well lately i have been sketching. just for practice. nothing has turned out good enough for me to share with you.
i haven't been jamming a lot this week either, but the little time that i did, i had some ideas that i was kind of excited about. so maybe that will go somewhere.

basically, i just have a TON of ideas lately! for everything.
photos, videos, artwork, songs, displays and fixtures for the store, website and graphic designs, space designs and arrangements, clothing, jewelry, hair, and WORLDS. i find myself just daydreaming and thinking of ideas all the time. almost too much.
by "worlds" i mean, everything in my head. if i could somehow take all these ideas and make them real, i could create my own world. i believe you can create your own world in any way.
i do it a lot in my dreams. i go to these amazing little towns and old shops, or just beautiful and strange places, atmospheres, old buildings. it's not just about the physical part of it (which in the case of dreams, there really isn't one). it's about the feeling it evokes.
for instance, you might see a photograph that just inspires you in such a way that you get a rush of ideas and can create a whole little world in your head out of these ideas.
i daydream A LOT. i find inspiration in soo many things in the world around me, i want to take them and make them my own. vines growing on the side of the freeway can be inspiring. i still remember these strokes of color i saw painted on a tree that i want to recreate in some kind of way.
i think you can also create your own world in the space around you. maybe this is why i'm constantly changing my room, trying to find that place.
so basically, it's hard for me to share these kinds of things with you, because right now, most of it is in my head. but that's a good start. everything starts as an idea. and all my thoughts are creating energy, which will hopefully, in some way or another, become energy in the physical world.
sometimes i can be frustrating; i feel like i have so much inside me i want to share and i just don't know how to get it out! i know i always come to the conclusion that my lack of equipment and skills (on the computer for example) has something to do with it, which it does, but i think i'll eventually figure it out. it's important to experiment with different things. which i should do more of. and i'd like to travel more! traveling and experiencing new places is definitely inspiring.

i definitely do feel like i live in my own world. this isn't always a good thing.
i don't keep up with things like new movies, music, or fashion, very well, although it does have some influence on me. i think it's good to keep up with these things, because it's a great way to seek inspiration and learn from others. i'm also horrible at keeping up with the news. this is not something i'm proud of. i don't know much about politics either. i'd like to keep up with the news and politics, but it's so hard for me. my brain just wants to shut off every time i hear a reporter's voice. sometimes i feel like i isolate myself too much. i spend a lot of time in my room, listening to my dad's old records, collecting and creating things from paper. it's pretty hard to find a balance between everything. does anyone ever find that balance?


bauregarde sauce said...

nope, that balance is kind of hard to reach.

Ivan's blog said...

dang crazy you got a blogspot!